Men- Divorce Financial Advice

Men need and deserve resources and support, also. You may have earned the money, managed the money and therefore are more comfortable with the figures and understanding the divorce settlement agreement. But this does not mean the divorce is easy for you, that it is painless for you. Men can struggle too.

Even Men who handled the family finances need to be sure to understand the intricacies of the financial options. Here are common mistakes to avoid: 

1.     This is my money. I worked for it, earned it- she didn’t - You were a team, both in earning money and raising your children and taking care of the house. This is not time to diminish the role of the other party. For whatever reason, you built your family and net worth this way. This is not the time to punish the other party for a perceived opinion that they didn’t “earn” any money. Conversely, you deserve as much credit for being a parent. 

2.     I refuse to share my retirement assets - Let this go. This is an emotional attachment that will not serve you. There may even be benefits to YOU to share some of these assets. Keep in mind that retirement withdrawals and pension income are NOT tax-free, you will pay Federal and State income tax. Share in the benefit by considering parlaying some retirement assets to your future ex, especially if they will be in a lower tax bracket during retirement. This is why projections, and an after-tax analysis is crucial.

3.     The bully mentality - You are both scared. It is common for this fear to come out as anger for men- don’t let it. It serves nobody. Be patient with your spouse, especially if this is a learning curve for the other party to understand financials for the first time as you may have always handled it in the past.  Working with a CDFA™ to incorporate financial planning projections into your settlement agreement and address everyone’s fears fairly.

4.     Refusing to ask for help - It is common to have the mentality that you can divide the assets and liabilities on your own, even draw up a divorce settlement agreement on your own. Please don’t do this. There are too many intricacies, considerations, pitfalls and you simply don’t know what you don’t know.

Ezharmony, LLC is here to support you through a kinder, gentler, and more affordable divorce. Let us support you!